All women, whether they are 21 or 60, worry about sex. Some may say that women worry about everything so if they are worried about sex, well... that's par for the course. Nevertheless, fretting about making love can affect your sex life, even if there's no real reason for you to worry.
The top thing that most women worry about is their bodies. What if he hates my body? I'm too fat, there's no way I can undress in front of him! My chest is very flat, how can I enhance it? These are just a few examples of what women are concerned about when it comes to intimacy and lovemaking.
However, expecting a body like a supermodels' is not exactly a realistic expectation. Yes, you can work towards your body, but even if you do not look like Eva Longoria or Kareena Kapoor, it does not necessarily follow that your man will hate your body!
Worry #1: I hope I don't get pregnant
Getting pregnant is the main reason women may not want to indulge in sex. However, if you take the necessary precautions such as using a condom or taking a birth control pill, you won't have to worry about an unwanted pregnancy. If you do get carried away in the heat of the moment and have not protected yourself, you can take an emergency contraceptive pill.
Worry #2: Do all women have trouble climaxing, or is it just me?
Only about 25% of women who have sex achieve an orgasm, so you're definite not alone. Women have the tendency to think something is wrong with them if they cannot climax, and thus resort to faking it. But instead of doing that, tell your partner the truth and then both of you should try to figure out what excites you the most.
Worry #3: I worry that masturbation may be wrong.
So not true! Masturbation is not wrong or unhealthy for either men or women. In fact, if you do not achieve orgasm through regular intercourse, masturbation can help you to understand your body and find out what will make you climax.
Worry #4: I'm not ready for sex but he is!
Feeling unsure about making love is absolutely normal. Many women have such doubts but feel that they should still go ahead and have sex to please their partner. But instead of doing that, you should tell your partner that the time isn't right for you. If he truly cares about you, he'll wait till you're ready!
Worry #5: I'm worried he will refuse to use a condom
Some women have a tendency to put on weight with birth control pills, which is why they prefer that their partner uses a condom. However, if you're not sure whether your man will agree to use one, or if he does not want to use a condom, you should take the responsibility of protecting yourself. A little added weight is nothing compared to an unwanted pregnancy!
Worry #6: Why won't he let me keep the lights off?
For women, wanting to keep the lights off while having sex stems from insecurity about their bodies. But like I mentioned before, you'll always find something wrong with your body and will never feel it's perfect. Instead, if you are comfortable in and about your own skin, your partner will be too. And then whether the lights are on or off, won't matter much!
Worry #7: I thought sex was supposed to be really amazing!
Which means it probably isn't for you. Sex is not all about penetration but cuddling, caressing, kissing, and fondling are all part of it. Ensure that your partner indulges in foreplay so that you can experience the wonder of sex. Oral sex too is another option for a really great time in bed.
Worry #8: I get turned on by women sometimes. Does that mean I'm a lesbian?
No, it doesn't. Finding another woman attractive is a very natural and common response. However, if you do find other women attractive, there are chances that you may be gay or even bisexual. But even heterosexual women can find other women sexy, so do explore your sexuality instead of putting any kind of tag on it.
Worry #9: Oh gosh. It really hurts!
Pain during sex can be for many reasons, but mostly it is due to lack of natural lubrication. Anxiety about sex and other physical problems can also result in painful sex. Use lubricating creams and then see if sex it still painful. If it is, consult your doctor.
Worry #10: My partner gets quite rough sometimes. Is that normal?
A little rough sex is quite normal, but then that depends on the definition of rough. What matters is whether or not you're comfortable with it. If so, then there's no issue at all. But if you're not comfortable or if you actually get hurt, then it's time to tell your partner to stop and be gentler. Don't start thinking that your partner is a weirdo; it could be as simple as your man not realizing his own strength.
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